run away...

we have already do our very best in managing it...
but i feel that all our hard work..
have become vain..
how can we do...
then just can make it better n better??
really tired d...

can i run away from the responsibilities???

can YOU tell me WHY??

always telling myself...
dun go care about u...
always say to myself...
I DUN CARE ABOUT YOU ANYMORE!!!
BUT WHY???
I STILL VERY CARE!!!!

you start to get hurt..
then the moment you begin to care...
so is that i will never get hurt...
if i never care about everything???

ya...
seriously...
i am very hurt...
not because to that matter d...
but because of the attitude that u treat me...
am i do anything wrong??
pls tell me ok??
YOU will know who i am talking...

ya...
i am the VP of JLS...
but this post is totally not important to me...
i am just a normal girl...
i am just ur best friend...
i duno now u still treat me as ur best friend not...
but i still treat u as my best best friend at here..
inside society..
i am vice president...
but it is just temporary...
outside society...
u still are my best best friend...
this fact will never change...
i appreciate every single things around me...
i appreciate all my friends...

so..
can we back to before??
i know this is a really damn stupid question...
but this is the question...
that keep stuck inside my heart...

我到底在担心什么??

说真的...
我真的不知道自己在担心什么...
自己在害怕什么...
怎么我一直觉得有块大石头...
压在我的心里...
真的快喘不过气来了...
是压力吗?
这个学期...
有好多好多事等着我去完成...
我不想再fail了...
fail subject对我来说真的太残忍了...
我好担心..
我的成绩...
会因为忙这些event而荒废...
我好害怕...
好害怕我没办法manage好这些event...
好害怕来不及完成preparation...
好害怕event弄得不好...
好害怕大家没办法团结在一起...
好害怕因为弄event的关系...
搞得大家不开心...
心里有万分的害怕...
还有万分的担心...
非笔墨能形容...
有谁能明白??

压力!!!
无形的压力!!!
你比任何事物都还来得折磨人!!!!
真的快疯了!!!!

decision.....

never regret what u have already decided...
ya...
i will never regret about it...
that decision make me become more mature...
and make me know alot...
but that decision is not related to this post..

last fews month..
i did 2 decisions..
which have changed my life actually...
and which is very hard to me seriously...
1 is that decision which is the big secret to me...
dun ask me is what secret...
and another 1 is this decision...
but i will keep it as secret currently..

i tot i should be happy about this decision...
i tot i have already decided...
but y when the time is getting near to me..
i will feel so scared and worried...
it is really a new life for me...
which i dream of for a very very long time...
but now...
i am wondering...
is it a best choice for me??
is it a best decision??
is it the decision that i make only for running away from the BIG SECRET??
i really dunno...
i have lost in my world again...
again n again....
what should i do??
there are so many things that i still can't let go...
hope nothing will change during tis few years...
hope i can let go all the things...
hope i didn't do any wrong decision for my life...

Never ever give up~~

your biggest enemy on this world...
is always YOURSELF...
but not others...
always think positive...
nothing can fight you down...
unless you give up yourself...
所谓天将降大任于斯人也..
必先苦其心志...
劳其筋骨...
饿其体肤...
空乏其身...
行拂乱其所为...
所以动心忍性...
增益其所不能..

result out...
A to D i also get..
2 As 2 Bs 2 Cs and 1 D!!
1st time i get A for my exam in MMU...
and also 1st time i failed my subject in MMU...
this result really make me 哭笑不得...
i can't believe that my BIB can get A-...
can't believe that my BIN can pass...
and also...
CAN"T BELIEVE THAT MY MACROECONS get D+...
D+ means FAIL!!!!
WTH!!!
i dunno how to do BIN...
but i can get C+...
i dunno how to do BIB...
but i can get A-...
i dunno how to do BOB...
but i can get B...
i dunno how to do BET...
but i can get C...
i dunno how to do BHR...
but i can get B+...
got 1 subject no need exam...
i get A for my BEN...
BUT WHY!!!
who can tell me...
I KNOW HOW TO DO BEC...
but why i fail it...
i studied it for so many days...
but at last...
i failed the subject that i put most effort in it...
so sad...

seriously i got abit disappointed...
but it is not the end of the world..
never give up...
i will do it better for next time...
haha..
GAN LUO WEI~~
you can do it...
you must 要越挫越勇~~
n never ever give up~~
jiayou~~^^

i am just a normal girl...

我只是个普通的女孩...
一直希望...
有人疼爱...
有人包容...
有人让我撒娇...
有人能陪在我身边...
有人喜欢带我逛街...
有人乐意带我去他去的各种场合...
并把我介绍给他的朋友...

我只是个普通的女孩...
一直希望...
有人记得每天和我说晚安...
有人记得我们过去的点滴...
有人绝不把承诺作儿戏...
希望有人惦记我...
在我郁闷大哭时把我的头按在胸膛...

i am just a normal girl...
wish to have a normal life...
wish to have a people who can understand me...
wish to have a people...
who can say...
u can act strong in front of others...
but in front of me...
u can just be yourself...
u not need to act strong...
wish to have a people...
to look at me in the eyes when i say i am ok...
and hug me tight and say...
"I know you are not Okay, so tell me the truth."

you will never know...

something that you will never know...
coz i hide it inside my heart carefully....
you know??
it was so damn hard to me...
to hide all the feeling in my heart...
the feeling is getting more n more...
sometimes...
i even can't control anymore..
how about you?
so you have the same feeling with me??
after that day...
i ask myself must be more tough than before..
coz i can see you everyday...
i was really hard to me...
haha...
but now seems everything have over already...
i felt the feeling in my heart is become mature...
yea...
it is not compulsory that...
two person who are love each other must be together...
to be couple...
also can become the soulmate that having love...
although sometimes will feel sad when recall back the days...
but the days were become our past...
although i still feel that it was really not fair to me...
but i know that...
you are also very hurt because of this matter...
if got fate...
we will be together again with no any concerns...
haha...
i will put you in my heart...
although how i seem not care about it...
but actually...
I CARE...
i just act like i dun care...
because i dun want you to worry about me...
haha...
gambateh to you^^